The top 5 regrets of the dying

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This is one oF the last book I have read, and I only want you all to read it as well!

this is so inspirational, it is a life-changing book!

Why not trying to avoid those regrets?

While we are all busy dealing with our life, we often forget that life won’t last forever. It may even be taken tomorrow, for us or for our loved one. Everything can dramatically change in 1 second only.

It’s easy to forget what an amazing gift life really is.  Waking up each morning is a beautiful blessing and we should be grateful for it, lot of people won’t have this chance again.

Life is given to us for a definite amount of time, some will live longer than other  but we all are going to die at some point. This life is going to stop soon or later and  It is very important to realise it and keep it in mind. Not that I want you  to live in fears, thinking of death constantly and forbidden yourself of taken any risks. But For you to LIVE, to truly use every day, every minutes and every second of your life to live and build a life that fulfil you with happiness and satisfaction before you go. I want you to pay attention to what really matter and leave away what is not making you happy. You have no time for such things.

A happy life is made of Happy memories, and guess what? You are building memories NOW.

Do something you like everyday, find a reason to smile and laugh, tell your loved one how important they are to you. Every morning is a new chance to start something new, to forgive, to love, to go, to do, to think. This is the magic of life, YOU can do everything you can dream of as long as you are alive.

Go on now, live, smile and avoid drama simply because it doesn’t really matter.

 Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we react to it.

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For many years Brownnie Ware worked in palliative care. Her patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. She was with them for the last 3 to 12 weeks of their lives.

People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. She learnt never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. In this book she gives us the top five regrets of the dying.

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.

This post was originally published on Inspiration and Chai.

 

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 you can find it here